Exploring the Parallels Between Devotional Sex and Chastity Play

Has anyone here come across “Devotional Sex”? I found their website on Tumblr this week. The terminology is a touch too mystical for me, but the parallels with chastity play are definitely worth noting.

Glancing at it briefly, it does appear similar—a gentler version of FemDom.

Hello, I am the author behind the Devotional Sex website. I saw visitors coming from this forum to my site and dropped in for a peek. @elwoodinchastity - Apologies if you found the language a bit too mystical. That style comes from trying to make it very welcoming to women. As you noted, there are many significant similarities between Devotional Sex and chastity play (as well as FemDom), but also differences—in each case, Devotional Sex tends to be milder. It also includes a tantric element, and the avoidance of ejaculation often carries a Taoist influence (think multi-orgasmic men). I am happy to answer any questions, though I will hold back from posting more so as not to derail this thread. Michael

Please don't take offense at my comment. It is strictly a personal preference and not meant as criticism of the quality of information you provide. I wish I had discovered your site ten years ago. Please do stay in our forum. Your perspective would be a great addition to this community.

No offense taken!:) Reading another thread about finding a Key Holder (KH), I noticed one distinction between chastity and Devotional Sex. One person suggested that a way to approach it is "you might seek a relationship with someone special, and when the time feels right, give that person the gift of your sexuality by handing over the key once trust has grown." What I suggest for Devotional Sex is that the man discusses things just before, or at the very start of first intimacy, meaning Devotional Sex begins from day one of the relationship. I have had great success dating 'normal' women and having my date enjoy 'my kink'—often on a first date. I wonder if there is a way for a man into chastity to bring this up early and be successful, right from that first date? How would you make male chastity sound appealing to a woman during a first date?

Hi Michael, welcome aboard. I am reading your posts now and it does seem like there is real common ground. I noticed you have some writing pending regarding male chastity, so I hope you find plenty of useful information here! This forum tends to be much more grounded in the real world, couple-focused, and straightforward (in my humble opinion). To answer your question.. The idea of a polite, attentive man who understands that women experience sex differently than men—and therefore lets her take charge while reassuring her of his love—is attractive to any woman immediately. Chastity is just the tool; keys, devices, and techniques are all merely practical details. Guys often discover chastity but dive in at the wrong moment. That’s really it—a feature of how male and female sexuality express themselves differently. Maturity, experience (both good and bad), and a genuine desire to make relationships work on every level break down those barriers. We actually have an active thread right now discussing exactly this. Guys looking for a "*key holder*" are asking the wrong question—they should be seeking a relationship where they can build deep trust and understanding. The key is mostly symbolic, and the device ritualistic. Plenty of people operate on the honor system and don't view what they do as particularly kinky.

> member_cbd126a6de wrote: > I'm the writer of the Devotional Sex site. I noticed people arriving at my site via this forum, and popped in to take a look. Thanks for noticing us!:) I only did a quick browse of your site last night but hope to return and explore more when I have extra time. Most of my time was spent trying to figure out the carving on your home page. Is there an explanation for that on your site, or am I missing something obvious?