Collars in Female Led Relationships/Marriages

For those of you in female-led relationships or marriages, does your wife make you wear a collar regularly or require it? Have you worn one before? I’m interested in the logic behind it… anyone care to share?:)

No FLR here...but I suppose that I could see a use for one. Being much stronger than Mrs. Twisted, physically speaking, if I were to refuse to lock back up there wouldn't be much she could do about it (not immediately anyway- there are certain allowable extreme measures that could be brought into play later). But, if a big, bulky collar were to be put/locked on before uncaging, with the caveat that it would not be removed until I was re-caged, it could be an effective incentive. I've never worn one, and I certainly wouldn't dare go out in public wearing one.

Oh gosh no public stuff! So as a reminder? It seems to me it would show ownership... is that about right? I do realize there is the whole "pet" aspect and leashes and all that but I'm more talking about the around the house stuff... look forward to more opinions or experience!:)

Although we do not have a D/S relationship, we have nice collars for both of us to use at playtime. When we have the house to ourselves, the one who is "played with" often wears hers/his. -K

Not exactly a collar. But whenever I need a shave below, before unlocking me, she chains my neck to the bathroom shower pipe and both hands behind my back. Then she shaves, cleans & lock me again. I am not allowed to touch 'her property' in the last many months.

> member_03509db961 wrote:Although we do not have a D/S relationship, we have nice collars for both of us to use at playtime. When we have the house to ourselves, the one who is "played with" often wears hers/his. > -K So K, what do you feel the collar is showing? The submission? Where do you get a collar? Any suggestions for comfortable but very inexpensive... I wonder (during a play session) what it might be like but don't want to spend a lot of money if I don't like it. I'm just wondering if it well help distinguish those sessions from other times.

> LadynMonkey wrote:Any suggestions for comfortable but very inexpensive... I wonder (during a play session) what it might be like but don't want to spend a lot of money if I don't like it. You can do what we did and just head to your local pet store. You'd be surprised at some of the designs, and they happen to be a lot cheaper than specific BDSM type collars (which are often custom made to begin with.) You could always just use one of the collars, and if you decide you realy like its uses and symbolism you could then invest money on a nice collar. Or, you could make one yourself:) .

> Where do you get a collar? Any suggestions for comfortable but very inexpensive... Any of the quintillion web sites dedicated to sex toys... The pet shop is good too... We use a collar during some of our sessions. It establishes the clear boundary between submissive and Domme that can sometimes be blurred during the reality of real life regardless of the D/s FLR we live daily. During training sessions and play sessions we operate a much more formal distinction and the collar helps. My tattoo is the constant reminder of my place in our marriage, I don't wear a collar in everyday life, it just doesn't work like that for us plus work would be a big problem...:D The collar is very symbolic for us. CQs

You guys are really great, you know that? I appreciate your help and experience! CQs, See hubby has his tattoos for the everyday reminder of who he belongs to (oh and his cage lol) but I wanted to find a specific way to distinguish sessions where I would be extremely dominant. Where we would be really pushing the D/s thing... plus I think I might have mentioned, I'm not looking for a slave or anything like that, I happen to prefer hubby being a man lol. I really just want a symbol and something I could set out for him to wear so he would know what kind of mood I was in. Like for example if I wanted to play a "houseboy" session... I would obviously be treating him differently than normal and saying things I might not normally say. Instead of saying "ok we're going to start now..." I'd rather have an unspoken symbol so he knows how hee is to behave. Am I making sense? Is there another way besides a collar to symbolize that?

Oh, and, for real? The pet store? Lol oh my... interesting!

> LadynMonkey wrote:Oh, and, for real? The pet store? Lol oh my... interesting! Like all things, the minute it is associated with a "life style" or a hobby the price goes up. Walk around any yacht chandlers or aircraft or equestrian suppliers and the price is many times what it is for the "same thing" in the local DIY hardware store.... BDSM type collars tend to have extra loops etc for futher bondage and restraint but a dog collar is a good option

> LadynMonkey wrote:... plus I think I might have mentioned, I'm not looking for a slave or anything like that, I happen to prefer hubby being a man lol. I guess it really comes down to how you look at it. You see, for me, if I act as my wife's slave (at least during play) it makes me feel more manly. I'm a pretty "alpha" guy, and the way I picture it in my head is that I'm some kind of gladiator figure, able to crush skulls and destroy any opponent. However, all that power is harnessed in the control of one person: my Mistress. A "slave" can be a rottweiler or a poodle. Either way, the dog is subservient to its master. Am I getting my point across? I've had a long day, lol. Have you ever seen "Unleashed" with Jet Li?:P > LadynMonkey wrote:Am I making sense? Is there another way besides a collar to symbolize that? It can really be anything, although a collar is particularly symbolic. You could light a special candle in the room when you're about to get serious. Heck, perhaps you could just attach a leash to his cage.

> I guess it really comes down to how you look at it. You see, for me, if I act as my wife's slave (at least during play) it makes me feel more manly. I'm a pretty "alpha" guy, and the way I picture it in my head is that I'm some kind of gladiator figure, able to crush skulls and destroy any opponent. However, all that power is harnessed in the control of one person: my Mistress. A "slave" can be a rottweiler or a poodle. Either way, the dog is subservient to its master. Am I getting my point across? I've had a long day, lol. what he said.