Wife Desires Long-Term chastity for Me Is This Sustainable?

After nearly a year of experimenting with wearing a device, my wife and I are considering a more lasting, steady arrangement. We both feel our marriage has improved significantly, inside and outside the bedroom, since I asked her to be my key holder. Although I don’t wear the device constantly, I am expected to remain chaste (meaning no self-gratification). My wife recently completed an “course” in FLR, where the moderator argues that the male orgasm is a selfish, pointless act that should be consistently denied. My wife loves how attentive and good I am when she denies me release after several weeks, but dislikes my moody, selfish behavior afterward. So, aside from occasional ruined orgasms and night emissions, my wife is leaning toward permanent denial. I wonder if anyone else here has experience with this—is it realistic to live one’s life this way, or will I become a basket case in short order? Any advice or shared experiences are welcome.

I really do think permanent orgasm denial is achievable, but it will require commitment from both of you. For you, the first month or so will be tough, but things will improve over time. You'll have "moments of desperation" at various points that both of you (especially your KeyHolder) must manage. Over time, keeping you chaste might actually be harder on your spouse than on you. She will need to keep things interesting for you, continually encourage you, and ensure her own sexual needs are met. You'll both have to expand your definition of sex beyond intercourse. I suspect she may grow tired of managing a chaste male before you tire of the chastity itself. Talk it through extensively together, discuss expectations, and create a plan. Don't expect her just to lock you up; she must also work to keep your journey interesting for you. You have to commit to being a better spouse and focus entirely on her pleasure during any sexual activity, making sure she knows this is what you want. Reading some of my writings in the Fiction section might help, but be aware they were primarily written for entertainment yet contain worthwhile information on longer-term and permanent OD. Although I am locked for periods of several months occasionally, neither of us desires permanency (at least not yet). Please keep us updated.

> member_83422178e2 wrote: > After nearly a year of experimenting with wearing a device, my wife and I are considering a more lasting, steady arrangement. > > So, aside from occasional ruined orgasms and night emissions, my wife is leaning toward permanent denial. I wonder if anyone else here has experience with this--is it realistic to live one's life this way, or will I become a basket case in short order? Any advice or shared experiences are welcome. ...there may be varying levels of "permanency". My wife is determined that chastity should be a permanent (or at least for the foreseeable future) part of our lives, meaning I stay chaste 100% of the time if practically possible, of course. She insists on and enforces it; just this morning I was allowed out with my cage off but base ring still on to stroke my cock near orgasm, then calm down before returning to the cage. The second form of denial for this year is her decision to make 2016 an orgasm-free year to counter post-orgasm moodiness. It's an experiment she wants to try to improve my behavior "permanently," so a full year of denial counts as fairly permanent in my book. Another aspect is milking; if my KH can get me milked once a month, she may lean toward complete orgasm denial or use the orgasm as a special treat I must earn. This improves my behavior while offering a potential reward. I have no problem with 24/7 chastity and love being chaste for her, and she loves the obvious behavioral improvement plus me dedicating myself to her. The orgasm denial part is something I still need to adjust to; it's hard at times because I am constantly horny for her—which is what she wants—so this plays into her vision of our FLR and its future path. Honestly, however, I would prefer an orgasm every few months at least, with the caveat that if my behavior remains good, she extends the timeframe. But right now, I am on day 28 out of 366 in this orgasm-free year—which she, as your wife feels it should be, may just be permanently denied... Maybe being milked will help.

I am on day 47 with no orgasm and only one erection. I'm locked up like a jailbird. She says she might let me cum sometime in March, as I am not allowed to touch it or cum without her hand involved.

I'm getting close to that point. It's been about two months since I was uncaged, and I've only had milked and ruined orgasms while wearing the device, so no erections at all and no release for anything else. MsM has an extra security option for the Contender on its way; it comes with a seal that must be cut off with side-cutters so it won't come off often after that. She has decided to switch me over to the old HT2 while traveling overseas, but I will remain totally locked.

I have mixed feelings about this. I recently managed to explain to my wife why I want denied orgasm in a way that made sense. It's because of the electric reaction my body has to her orgasms after being denied for about three weeks. The first time I experienced this 'bodygasm', it was much more powerful than an ordinary orgasm and lasted longer. She then decided that I no longer needed regular orgasms and became totally fine with denying me. Before that, she used to worry she was being cruel. So we made a joint decision that long-term denial is something I actually desire. My issue lies with the whole 'Male orgasm is selfish' angle. If you aren't party to the decision for long-term or permanent denial, surely the person doing the denying is being selfish? Personally, my post-orgasm behavior change hasn't happened much, and I don't understand why anyone would let their behavior shift so easily. My wife doesn't stop being my wife just because she lets me cum, nor does she cease to be my mistress. Our FLR structure doesn't evaporate as my semen cools, so why should my attitude toward her leadership change? The point is that while my wife doesn't believe I need orgasms anymore for myself, she still wants me to have them because she enjoys watching them happen, like many women do. She likes feeling my body tremble, seeing me ejaculate, and observing my reaction—an intense outpouring of emotion since it has become about a once-every-six-weeks event. She still wants sex with me and feels me cum inside her. The one thing this male chastity hasn't done is spill over into denying her as well. So if any women started telling her that my orgasms were selfish, she would tell them exactly where to go politely the first time, but my wife only remains polite for so long with someone who upsets her.

The last time I took the cage off was in August 2015, and my most recent orgasm back then was March of that year. When I ask my wife when she plans to take it out next, her answer is always "years." So this feels pretty close to permanent for me. The locks get checked every couple of weeks, but the cage itself stays on. Thanks to the open design, keeping clean hasn't been an issue.

I've had two releases over the last year. Back around three years ago, I went locked for two full years with basically no release—about one a year since then. So yes, I'm essentially permanently locked now. I love it, and she loves me very much.

> member_fdb08c9cfe wrote:I have mixed feelings about this. > I recently managed to explain to my Wife the reason that I want to be denied orgasm in a way that made sense to her. It is because of the electric way my body reacts to her orgasms after I have been denied for about three weeks. The first time I experienced this 'bodygasm' it was so much more powerful than an ordinary orgasm and went on for much longer. She then decided that I no longer needed orgasms and was now, at last, totally fine with denying me. Before that she used to worry that she was being cruel. > So we came to a joint decision that long term denial was something that I actually desired. > My issue is with the whole 'Male orgasm is selfish' angle. If you are not party to the decision for long term or permanent denial then surely the person doing the denial is the one being selfish? Personally my experience of post orgasm change of behaviour just has not happened and I don't understand why anyone would allow their behaviour to change. My Wife doesn't stop being my Wife just because she let me cum and she equally does not stop being my Mistress. Our FLR doesn't evaporate as my cum cools, so why should my attitude towards her leadership change? > The point is that while my Wife doesn't believe I need orgasms any more she does still want me to have them, because she enjoys them, as many women do. She enjoys feeling my body tremble, seeing me ejaculate, seeing my reaction. Which, by the way, is an intense outpouring of emotion as it has become about a once in six week event. She still wants me to have sex with her and to feel me cum inside her. The one thing this male chastity has not done is spill over into her being denied as well. > So if one of these women was to start telling her that my orgasms were selfish she would tell them where to go. Politely the first time, but my Wife only remains polite for a limited time with someone who upsets her. I agree. My wife is independent and forms her own opinions; she doesn't need others dictating what should happen or how she should act. The 'bodygasm' you mentioned is exactly why she enjoys denying me orgasms, or minimizing/ruining them. She likes keeping my desire high. It’s the opposite of selfish—she lets me stay in this blissful state, and I adore her for it. She also enjoys my orgasms, but those are her decision now, having been so for over 18 months. Personally, I prefer permanent control over masturbation and orgasm rather than complete denial forever. I mean, once she actually makes me climax just from nipple (and recently earlobe) stimulation, how is that really a denial?;)

Remember that "chastity" doesn't necessarily mean denying orgasms entirely. I don’t think permanent, 24/7 locked chastity is very doable mainly due to hygiene and health reasons, but permanent orgasm denial seems possible. The tricky part comes during the inevitable 'resistance' phase—when you start wondering if giving up your orgasms was really worth it. For me, getting through that period is easier when I hold onto the idea that ML will eventually grant me an orgasm... The question remains: when? If someone told me I’d never have another one again, I think I would struggle to accept that.