Chastity and orgasm denial discussion

Hello! I’m just beginning to embrace my kinks, and chastity is a major part of that for me. Right now, I’m under the control of an online key holder through emlalock, but I’d like to know how others met their spouse or partner, especially regarding how you brought up the topic of chastity with them—or if they brought it up first? I use dating sites, yet I’m unsure about filtering for women who would be into this dynamic. Perhaps there are more women than I anticipate who might enjoy this? As a submissive man, am I in a minority position seeking out an even smaller niche group? I’d really appreciate any tips!