Online chastity and self locking discussion

When I first joined sites for fetish interests, I knew nothing about chastity; in fact, I hadn’t even heard the word. I began getting messages from men asking me to hold their keys. The conversations usually went like this… Men: Please keep my key! Me: I don’t know much about chastity. What’s the point? Men: If you hold his key, you can make a man do anything. Me: Like what? Men: Anything at all! Me: Give me some examples. Men: You can force me to do embarrassing things on webcam I’ll dance naked for you I’ll perform any degrading acts you desire You can watch me using my toys, I have… (a long list of anal toys) You can tease me Me: Well, those aren’t really my thing; they are yours. Men: But you’re dominant. You must enjoy controlling someone. Me: I do, provided there is a purpose or benefit for me. Men: Surely you must love the idea of someone sacrificing their penis and orgasms for your sake! Me: Why should I care about the penises and orgasms of strangers? Men: Because you are dominant! Me: A truly dominant woman would likely be less interested in random men’s penises, not more. The wives and girlfriends on this site mostly seem into chastity because they see personal benefits. They notice their male partner becomes more loving and attentive, or he spoils them with gifts, or takes on more household chores. Why do these people assume I want to give strangers kinky thrills just for the sake of it? Then there’s the “findom” trap. Men: I’ll pay you £?? a week if you hold my key! Me: Well, that does make it sound more appealing. I might consider it. Men: You’re only interested in money! What an exploiting whore! Me: No, I didn’t ask you to message me about your fetish. You are the one who reached out. This dynamic applies to any online fetish community, not just chastity. To find a dominant woman online, you need to demonstrate some benefit to her. For instance: “I would love to serve you and handle whatever tasks you wish, like researching, proofreading, editing photos, or writing stories for you—anything that makes your life easier. And if you hold my key, it will deepen my commitment because my mind will be focused entirely on serving you. I’ll have no distractions and work even harder to please you.” To me and many others, chastity is simply a tool to make a man more useful, much like putting a leash or collar on a dog. So stop complaining that you can’t find a keyholder; just become USEFUL!