Female led relationships discussion

I could use a bit of advice. We are in the process of establishing a FLR relationship between my wife and I. Rules are being set, etc … I have two request that I ask of my wife 1) Is that she should dress up a bit fancier when we are out and about and sometimes in the house a bit sexier (nothing crazy or really in appropriate, honestly it would probably be allowed in a school environment). and 2) I would like her to relax more and have more free time, to just lounge around or go out. Her response is that by me asking her to do this, I am actually going against the entire FLR concept. Which while I understand what she is saying, my reasoning behind it is two fold. 1) That in my mind, seeing her being able to dress fancier (or just lounging around) because she doesnt need to take care of the kids, etc.. because of my doings is a big reward and helps me able to do more to enable that and 2) As far as the sexier clothing is concerned, the more “turned on” I am the easier it is for me to do things and the more I want to do it. I know in a perfect world, I wouldnt need these simulations in order to help me. But in reality (at least in the beginning) I need it. On my part, I am going out of my way, including she has me in 24/7 chastity lock up. So a bit more effort on her end to make things easier would be appreciated. Any suggestions? Thank you