Female led relationships discussion

(Note: This was originally shared on my blog last week - High Heels and Butt Plugs) A major hurdle for many women who are exploring female-led dynamics is finding the confidence to take charge. Historically, at least, our upbringing has defined specific roles for men and women. A woman’s role tended to be more passive, with an underlying expectation of submission to her husband—you know, “Honour and Obey”—OMG!! While things have shifted significantly from #metoo onwards toward workplace equality, this deep-seated conditioning can still make taking control in the bedroom feel intimidating for many. In this blog post, I’ll highlight two areas that helped me build confidence, and hopefully they will help you as well… **You’re Sexy… ** One reason people dive into female-led dynamics is to inject kink and excitement into their relationship. I’ve noticed that when I look sexy, I feel sexier, which boosts my confidence, whether I’m dressing up in the bedroom or stepping out for an evening. Inside the bedroom, it feels a bit like wearing a uniform; for instance, my boots set an expectation for him and give me a sense of power. I appear taller, he understands they signal that I am in a specific mood, and I simply love how I look in them—all these elements combine to build up my confidence for some bedroom play. Stepping out is similar. Being made-up and feeling sexy builds confidence just like above, but with the added bonus of attention from others. People commenting on your appearance, men (or women) watching you, and especially him seeing that he’s getting all this attention is wonderful. To me, establishing in both his mind and yours that you are a sexy woman creates a subconscious shift in power, building control and giving you the confidence to take more. **Your Cock… ** So much of what drives him centers on that little thing between his legs. Gaining control over his cock was crucial for me in taking power while he embraced passive submission, not just during playtime but generally. For me, managing orgasm and chastity were the key (excuse the pun). Our arrangement is straightforward: I come when and if I want; he only comes when I allow it—see below. Managing his cock (which has become mine) and deciding when he can climax really boosted my confidence. Setting some rules helps immensely here are my rules for him:

• No masturbation ever.
• No touching without permission.
• He wears the cage whenever I want him to.
• Usually, he is only permitted to cum inside me, and only after I am FULLY satisfied.
• On those rare occasions when he is allowed to cum elsewhere, he must clean up his mess. Note: He holds a fantasy view of licking up his mess (as do many men), but in reality, post-climax he doesn’t particularly enjoy it. So, the expected consequences after a few forced clean-ups make having an orgasm outside me part of our disciplinary play. The confidence that has grown from controlling his orgasms and cock has truly given me the power to push further in our relationship and explore both of our kinks more deeply. So to sum up - feel sexy, recognize you are a sexy Goddess, and take control of the cock—you will be amazed at what it does for your confidence and your relationship. Goddess D. [photo=large]28082[/photo]