Female led relationships discussion

We try to keep our FLR life going in public without making a fuss. Since we both hold prominent positions and my wife’s is especially visible, we aim for that presence while keeping things fairly standard. This builds on the community page mentioned earlier which covers what happens behind closed doors. Back when Domestic Discipline was new to us, I had to address her as “My Darling HOH.” Removing ‘HOH’ lets me use this phrase almost anywhere without drawing attention; people just think I’m a romantic fellow. For us though, it carries specific weight: saying “Yes, My Darling” signals I’ve grasped her order, while answering “Would you like a drink, My Darling” confirms I recognize she is the Head of Household. Simple. We also explored other titles back then. She wasn’t keen on Miss or Goddess; Mistress was acceptable but our top choice became Lady. This title works beautifully in restaurants and pubs—phrases like “The same for the Lady” or “Lady would prefer…” feel natural, vanilla, and widely accepted. I even bought her a square foot of land up in the Highlands. In Scotland, owning that plot lets one use the title ‘Lady’ (or ‘Laird’ if male). My £25 investment means my wife is now officially Lady C, backed by a certificate, a photo of the marshy plot (roughly 1:1 scale), and an Ordnance Survey map pinpointing her property. It’s become quite fun; friends, coworkers, and even our regulars at the pub know she holds this title. So when the cheeky bar manager asks what Madam desires, she retorts, “It’s Lady C to you, and yes, we all know it!”

We have a couple of words with special meaning: “Present” and “Take Note.” “Present” is the signal from Lady C that my bare bottom needs lifting for discipline. It’s not always easy to weave into speech, but slight context shifts help—like saying “I’m working on a presentation later” or “He needs to get me a present.” When I hear “Take Note,” it means I’ve irritated her or messed up and must record the incident in our shared Evernote notebook. It usually goes something like: “Take note, I don’t appreciate cheek/…” Again, easy enough for outsiders but clear to me that I need to pull out my phone and start typing for her later review.

Messaging can be tricky—who wants FLR / DD / Femdom updates visible in SMS or WhatsApp while colleagues glance over? Our fix is simple: we use Google Hangouts for our NSFW chats. The app has a distinct alert sound and icon, so I know when it’s safe to open up the conversation.

We also sport subtle physical tokens. My Fitbit comes with interchangeable straps; if I’m caged, I wear a bright stainless steel bracelet. If asked, I call it a statement piece—just noting that I have a shiny metal band on me. My usual cheeky attitude helps pull this off without anyone thinking much of it. It’s bright and draws plenty of comments, mostly from women. Occasionally, if Lady C has reddened my backside nicely, I swap in the red silicone one. Lady C wears a necklace with a charm that looks like a tiny bullet but contains a functional padlock key inside. You can slide it up and down, rotate it, and play with it. It’s not actually for our cage (we use the Mature Metal security screw), but its symbolic value to me is high when she wears it. She gets lots of compliments because it stands out. I also wear a chain—high-quality silver with an identity tag that isn’t your typical tin dog tags, but a stainless steel Armani piece engraved on the back with ownership details. So next time you spot us around town or hear our banter, do say hello!

Around home and work, we manage FLR discreetly; when traveling or holidaying, we push it further. When booking hotels or connecting to WiFi on trains, we use Lady C’s title, sometimes even having receptionists call out for “Lady C” in a crowded lobby. We might wear polo shirts marked “Team DD,” I’ll sport my chaste T-shirt while hers says “Oh Yes.” No major complaints yet, though some have given us double-takes.

When traveling, the cage stays on as much as possible unless we’re flying, and our suitcase always contains at least a strap or paddle. There’s something thrilling about being in a city-center hotel with curtains open while getting spanked nearby—others might be within earshot in the corridor or next room, so it isn’t always silent. As She says, if you need punishment, why wait until we’re back home?

Wonderful. Thanks for sharing.

> Disciplined Boyfriend said: > In public we try to carry on our FLR activities, but we don't want to shout it out. We both have high profile jobs and my wife's, in particular, is very public facing. So we try to maintain the presence but keep it kinda vanilla. This is following on from the referenced community page which discusses what we do in private. > In the early days of Domestic Discipline, I had to answer / query her using "My Darling HOH". Dropping the HOH from this allows us to continue to use this vritually anywhere and all it appears is that I'm a sentimental dude. In reality for us, "Yes, My Darling" means I've understood her command, as "Would you like a drink, My Darling" means I've acknowledged that she is HOH. Easy. > Also at the same time we were looking for titles to use, she didn't like Miss or Goddess, Mistress was OK but our favourite was Lady. That one again is easy to use in restaurants and pubs - "And the same again for the Lady", "The Lady would like..." Still very vanilla and acceptable to everyone. Then I bought her a square foot of land somewhere in the Highlands. The upshot of this is a landowner in Scotland can use the title "Lady", or if a man, "Laird". So my 25 GBP allows my wife to be called Lady C, and has a certificate to prove it, a photograph of a boggy marsh (probably 1:1 scale) and a extract from the Ordnance Survey showing where her property is. Now it is fun, all our circle of friends, work colleagues, the guys and staff at the pub know that she is officially "Lady C". So now when the cheeky bar manager asks what Madam would like, she replies, "Its Lady C to you and well you know it." > There's a couple of word and phrases that have meaning in our relationship: "Present" and "Take Note". "Present" is the command Lady C uses when she wants my bare ass in the air ready for punishment. Not easy to put into a sentence, but by changing the context slightly it can be slipped into conversation. "I'm working on a presentation later" or "He needs to get me a present". "Take Note" when used means I've annoyed her or done something wrong and I need to make a note in our shared Evernote notebook. It goes like this - "Take note, I don't like cheek/....". Again easy to use and doesn't offend or give away secrets, but to me it means I need to get my phone out and starting typing for her later review. > Messaging can be a problem - who wants FLR / DD / Femdom messages in their SMS or WhatsApp messages and emails so that everyone looking over your shoulder can read? Simple solution, we use Google Hangouts for NSFW conversations. It has a different alert and a different icon so you can open it up when safe to do so. > We have one or two physical signs. I have a Fitbit with changeable watch straps. If I'm caged, then I wear a brightly coloured stainless steel bracelet. When asked, I say its a statement... that I'm wearing a bright metal band on me. My normal cheeky demeanor means I can pull this off - and I don't think anyone has ever thought any more of it. It is bright and I do get a lot of comments, most from woman, about my bracelet. Sometimes I put the red silicon one one if Lady C has reddened my ass. Lady C has a necklace with a charm - just looks like a small bullet. But it has a piece that can be slid up and down and rotated and played with and inside there is a working padlock key. Its not for the cage as we use the Mature Metal security screw, but it is symbolic for me when she wears it. Again she gets a lots of comments as its quite different to anything else. I also have a chain - again its high quality silver with a identity tag - not the tin dog tags, but a stainless steel Armani tag and its engraved on the back with ownership. So if you ever see us around town or hear us, then say hello. > So around our home and work we can carry on FLR without most people knowing - out travelling or on holiday we can take it a bit further. Registering for WiFi on trains or booking into hotels we use the Lady C title and have on a few occassions had a receptionist call across a reception full of people looking for Lady C - we also wear polo shirts with "Team DD", or I have a chaste T-Shirt, whilst hers has "Oh Yes". Not had any comments about that yet... but a few have had a double glance. > Another thing when travelling is that the cage is on as much as possible except when air travel is involved and there's always at least a strap or paddle in the suitcase. There's something about being in a city centre in a hotel with the curtains open and getting your ass strapped with other's potentially in earshot in the next room or corridor - its not always quiet. But as She says, if you need punished, then why wait 'till we get home. > Click to expand... Here's a fun fact. Mrs is short for mistress. Learn this the other day and now I use Mrs in pubic when addressing her

Interesting use of words and symbols.