He asked me to lead seven months ago and I still have not answered

He has asked me to lead and I have not said yes. I have not said no either. We have been sitting in that position for about seven months, and I am posting because I would like to hear from women who were once exactly here and are now somewhere else, in either direction.

We are thirty seven and thirty nine, north London, together nine years, no children, both with jobs we like. He is not pressuring me. He asked once, properly, and has not raised it since, which is somehow harder to deal with than if he nagged.

My honest position is that I like some of it very much and I am frightened of the rest. Mostly I am frightened of becoming formally responsible for his happiness, and of what happens if it turns out I am bad at it. He thinks I am worrying about a thing that does not exist. He may well be right and I do not want to find out by accident.

What would help is talking to women who lead and did not want to at first. Not to be convinced of anything. To hear what it is actually like on an average Tuesday, including the parts that are annoying, so that I am deciding about the real version rather than the one in my head.

He has read this and agreed to it going up. Not looking for anybody to join us, obviously. Not looking for men explaining why I should say yes. Not looking to be told that hesitating means I do not really want it, because a stranger has already tried that and it was no use at all.